Sunday, just as we were coming in the door after church:
Owen: Mama, how did the baby get in your tummy?
Sophie: Ooooh.. ya mom, how did the baby get there? (big ole snicker...)
Mom: Hey, that is a great question, Owen. And i know dad has a great answer for you.
Dad: Well, son...(then he ran away and hid in his bedroom closet.)
Mom: Owen, Mom's have eggs and Daddy's have sperm. And when an egg and a sperm get together, it makes a baby.
Soph: But Mom, how do they get together? How does the sperm meet the egg? Huh? HUH? ha, ha, ha.
Mom and dad at the same time: Sophie! (Of course, she's known everything from about age 7.)
Dad: Milk before meat, Soph.
I went back into their room and found a book i remember from my childhood, "You Were Smaller Than a Dot." I love this book. Its so 70's and so very simple and wonderful. I put it on the table and said, read this. I'll be back in just a few minutes and we can talk about it.
I went and changed out of my church clothes and by the time i came back he was nearly done. He just sat there reading about how babies are made. I got a little snack and sat down next to him and we got everything all sorted out...on a 5 year old, Owen level. Sorry, Soph. I know you'd love to be the spoiler, but I'm sure we'll get to that really big question someday.
p.s. Doug did not actually run away and hide in his closet. I just thought it sounded funnier that way.
Story #2
Doug booked a low budget commercial this week for some new contacts. He hates doing this kind of thing because he has to pull a bunch of favors on camera and crew and it usually turns into a big headache. However, he didn't have anything else going on this week and since we do have a baby on the way, some money is better than nothing, so he went for it. The product is for Wrigley Gum on the Fox Sports Network.
Well, he met the director (a pompous guy who's done some mediochre work) and the producer who seemed like a total knob. Appparently, he was pretty clueless and was making some really dumb / rookie type decisions. All red flags, of course, but Doug stayed with it. I have no idea what the concept is or the tag line or anything, but they wanted a bunch of urban people hanging out outside a liquor store.
They went on the location scout, found their liquor store and whatever else. The next day he gets a call from the producer who said the job was cancelled. Not totally out of the ordinary but if an agency books and then cancels the shoot, they have to pay everyone anyway. So most people don't like to do it very often.
Well, apparently Wrigley found the casting call online that went something like this:
"Hoochie Mamas needed for a Wrigley/Fox Sports Network commercial spot."
Are you kidding me? Hoochie mamas? He really published that? Ha ha. that's funny!
Apparenly, Wrigley didn't like that and fired him... and the director. Tough lesson,guys.
And let that be a lesson for doug, too. If they look and smell like a disaster, they probably are.
5 comments:
good stuff.
jb
I'm going to need the definition of a "total knob". I've never heard that one before but I have the feeling there are many people around here I could describe as a "total knob". Just need to know what it is I'm calling them. Thanks!
"smaller then a dot" also occupies our bookshelf. Good to have on hand.
Sounds like a total knob.
"Milk before meat." For some reason I had never heard that phrase before. The first time I read this I thought yall were at the dinner table or something. Ned set me straight.
okay, so i haven't been on my computer lately and those are great stories! especially the birds and bees one. gotta love sophie.
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